Donut Take Them for Granted

Dear Members and Constituents,
Why do we take things for granted? When you get down to it, we're a rather fortunate bunch. Yet, there is a propensity to under-value the people, experiences and things in our lives. We want what we don't or can't have. It's a human thing. I suppose this quest for more is the seed of our species' progress. If cavemen were content to sit by the fire we would not have the Internet. Still, one can never have it all, so why not enjoy what we have? The love of family, the company of comrades the comfort of hearth and home and, why not, Friday donuts.
Come, forget for a moment all the things you don't have and experience how sweet a donut can truly be when you're caught-up in the moment. Don't forget to thank Marc Solome while you're at it for his stellar debut in the club.

Happy Friday!

Ye all Come Hither, Donuts Hath Arriveth

[Ed Stocker; filling-in for JP]

Since today is April 23, and as you must already know April 23 is the official Talk Like Shakespeare day, I bring you a Friday morning Sonnet.*

Donuts and the Bard

‘Tis Friday, the three and twentieth day.
Officially time to talk like Shakespeare,
In the month of April, right before May.
Methinks this day shall pleaseth mouth and ear.

Start with the high post of donuts to eat.
To embrace and talk like the bard today,
Is a quest cousins, to you I entreat.
Use ur olde English and see what ye say.

Sir Rusty Corne is no canker-blossom,
A Dozen by four he hath supplieth.
LaMar’s sweet moist temptations most awesome.
Get thou to JP’s, don’t walk ye, runneth.

Wrap now this folly and move it along,
JP’s back next week, and I beat the gong.

*I didn’t say a good Sonnet.

Mmmmmmm, Donuts

[Ed Stocker; filling-in for JP]

According to JP’s extensive research work into Donut lore, today is the official International Day of the Donut*.

Isn’t it ironic that on the International day of the Donut, JP, our Donut CEO, is in Ecuador hundreds of miles from the nearest Donut purveyor; while we have 5 dozen of LaMar’s finest to celebrate this widely acclaimed international holiday. Some come by JP’s office and observe this, the most wonderful of holidays, with a freshly delivered donut courtesy of Yuko Aoyagi.

*Fact checkers have been unable to substantiate this claim by independent research, i.e. a Google search.

Today's Donuts are The Bomb!

Dear Members and Constituents,
With sports news dominating much of the headlines this week (baseball opening, golf sub-plots, blue devil this or that…), I decided to go in a totally different direction. This morning, I figured some common sense advice could come-in handy (not that any of you are lacking in this department). Ready, fire, aim!

1. Don’t smoke, it’s bad for you (if in doubt, refer to label on the cigarette pack)
2. If you do decide to smoke, don’t do it in designated non-smoking areas
3. Should you decide to contravene this advice, don’t smoke in places with stiff penalties and sanctions… say, the lavatory of an airplane
4. If, by chance, you feel an urge to go against this advice… and get caught, don’t joke about lighting a shoe bomb
5. Of course, none of the above applies if you are a diplomat

On the other hand, to my knowledge, the consumption of donuts has not been connected to cancer, emphysema or any second-hand ailments. Furthermore, I know of no place which bans their consumption or has created specially designated donut consumption areas. This morning, Jay Leslie (donut boy) makes it easy for you to indulge with four dozen delicious LaMar’s donuts (including a dozen specialty donuts). Put your fuse-less shoes on and come grab a bite. It’s bound to light-up your day.
Happy Friday!

Easter Donuts are Here

Dear Members and Constituents,
The Easter season has me thinking about pastel-colored hard-boiled eggs and bunnies… and how they came to be associated with this celebration. In my mind, the logic goes something like this:

• Eggs are inanimate objects out of which springs new life, a symbol of the miracle of resurrection. If a chick were to spring-out of a hard-boiled egg, now that would be quite the miracle
• Of course, as we all know, rabbits reproduce by means of laying chocolate eggs. A natural association anyone familiar with rodent biology would make
• As for the pastel colors, try as I might, I can’t think of a logical reason

If you ask me, I think we should add donuts to this disparate list. The justification might be the fact they are are a holy food (donuts have holes, get it?) or that they look like halos. Then again, as with the pastel colors, no justification may be necessary.

I think I may not be the only one who would like to create a tie between Easter and donuts. This week I received a T-Shirt which reads “The Donut Whisperer”. Thank you annonymous donor. Thanks also go to Melissa Nibbelnk for providing the four dozen delicious LaMar’s donuts sitting at my desk. So, if you’re in the office today, come and get your Easter treat.

Happy Friday!