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Showing posts from June, 2016

Apolitical Donuts

Friends, Every day that passes, I have a harder time empathizing with politicians. Their petty positions and narrow views feel like a half-hearted attempt at dark comedy gone wrong. It is for this reason I’ve decided to compose this poem for your consideration. I call it Dialectic Exploratory Missive of Senseless Verses Groaning Over Politics (DEMSvGOP) If fear and hatred seize the day and common sense is neither, you have two sides that must collide, with selfish mindless riders Why did the Britons vote to leave red tape and immigration, they think a Brexit might just fix it where’s Churchill’s fabled nation? But wait, look closer, here at home the presidential pageant some voting ‘neigh’ while others bray dystopian fates imagined Don Trump will trumpet like an oaf and Hillary’s hilarious third party dear, might you appear? elections are precarious Yet rain brings rainbows, this is true dark clouds have silver linings. So, don’t be

Donuts Without Borders

Friends, I believe going anywhere in the world (so long as you abide by the local laws) should be a human right. People should be allowed to wander freely (or vote with their feet whenever a government alienates them). In this, I fully support Doctors Without Borders’ decision to no longer accept funding from the EU due to their immigration policies. Good for them! That said borders can be useful. Take, for instance national sports teams. If there were no borders, events like the summer and winter Olympiads would not exist. Closer to home, those of you who follow soccer are probably tuning-in to the hundredth edition of Copa America , currently under way. Last night the quarter final opener featured both of the teams for which I've been rooting. Who do you cheer for when you know only one of your teams will advance? You can't root for both or you risk becoming a dispassionate observer, so, you either pick one or choose to narrate the game in English (i.e. no 100 MPH narra

The Problem With Finishing Each Other's Donuts

Finishing other people’s thoughts and sentences, no matter how closely aligned you may think you are, can be risky business. I admit I’ve been guilty of this bad habit –with sometimes unintended comedic consequences. Take the flight attendant on Wednesday’s flight to Atlanta. After telling us cross-check was complete, I mentally finished her next statement and thought I heard “doors are now armed and dangerous ” –she probably said " secure ". A sign, perhaps, I may have watched one too many action shows on TV. The same can probably also be said for finishing other people’s donuts and pastries –although in this case, if you’re not careful you risk having a finger bitten off (which, although painful, could prove hilarious in hindsight). Fortunately, this morning we have enough donuts for all, so sharing is optional. So, come start –and finish- your very own donut. Happy Friday!

Dangerous musings for National Donut day!

Friends, Progress. That move away from the stodgy and outdated towards the modern and exciting. We seem to have this deep rooted belief that things will inevitably spiral upwards. But what if this is as good as it gets? What if it’s all downhill from here? The Science Fiction genre of writing has often given us views of potential dystopian futures. After all, why must things inevitably get progressively better? The older you get the more nostalgi c you become and all those things you longed to change in your youth you wish you could get back in your old age. Perhaps it’s just change. Perhaps this e-mail has gone too deep into the philosophical realm and it’s time to pull us back to the shallow end. It is, after all, National Donut day (a ‘Hole-mark holiday’ –to quote the sage, Gabe Tuerk). Ironically, I was debating whether to bring-in donuts (our building management is, after all giving-out free donuts). I decided to compromise on a half-dozen donuts. So, before you come get yours