Friday Donuts

Dear Members and Constituents, Hard as it may be to believe, this year marks the first time I’ve actually enrolled in a fantasy football league. Yes. I’ve participated in office pools and brackets –and have occasionally bet the line, but that has been the extent of my involvement in sports gambling. You make a choice, put it down on paper and move-on. Fantasy football is a lot more involved. Sitting at 1 – 1, I’m still not sure whether this will be a long term thing for me. I’m fumbling around the graphical user interface, can’t seem to score the right players and have yet to engage in a satisfactory level of unsportsmanlike conduct (all puns, although bad, were intended). I have found that my interest level for games in which I would normally not have any emotional investment has increased, even though it creates some perverse incentives (hoping your kicker’s team is held to field goals or your quarterback’s team falls behind so they will be forced to pass more). I’d say moving...

Dear Members and Constituents, On foggy mornings such as this, it's easy to let the mind wander and fancy myself a rider galloping through a mysterious realm on a spirited steed. I picture myself in a timeless mountain valley where ghosts and magic are ready for an encounter, just beyond that 30 yard horizon. As I advance on this quest, I feel the crisp air against my skin, sharpening the senses. The world is smaller in this pocket of space which time forgot and my imagination is free to fill the blank. Alas, this magic moment lasts but a short while. As I drive up the hill that leads to the office, I notice that like a sharp battle axe, cutting through soft flesh the sun is breaking through the clouds; claiming victory in this mythical battle. The vision fades away like a distant dream. But wait! It appears not to be a dream after all. Evidence can be found at my desk. Sir Jim Johnson (donut boy) has delivered a bounty of delicious donuts. This treasure awaits in gold-plated ...

Dear Members and Constituents, In trying to figure-out Wednesday’s cool-looking Google Doodle ( Jorge Luis Borges’ 112 th birthday ), I stumbled across a list of Google Doodles you’ll never see. This, and a Rockies game later that day, were sufficient inspiration to get my head spinning around what other doodles Google might never noodle? I’m sure you’ll probably have a few ideas of your own, but I was able to come-up with a couple. How about a former Colorado Rockies player whose unfortunate encounter with a moth put him in the news this week? The Matt Holliday doodle might look something like this… Another item which, surprisingly enough, has not been made into a doodle are donuts. Although I was slightly taken aback to find this delicious pastry has not been featured, after the initial disappointment, I decided to take matters into my own hands and take a stab at one (perhaps Google can use it next year for national donut day )… or to celebrate Greek police having “ blown a ho...

Dear Members and Constituents, Last week, as I sat in a hospital room reading the paper I had a realization: proper names can sometimes take-on unintended meanings in the feeble minds of the easily-amused (such as myself). Not quite sure what I’m talking about? I will illustrate my point with a sampling of actual names that grabbed my attention this past week. Top ten funny names taken from recent media stories (or, as I like to say, what were their parents thinking?) Taco Stein . As I mused on the Aruban solicitor general and his dry cleaning tab (do taco stains come off?), I wondered how many people throughout history have shared his first name. Could it be that a popular fast food chain (which will go unnamed) was founded by a phone company heir -A.G. Bell’s illegitimate son, Taco? Julia Gillard . Is there a famous music school named after the Australian prime minister ’s abbreviated name? (hint: it’s Jiulliard) Anna Hazare . Not that funny a name, you say. Maybe not, until ...

Dear Members and Constituents, It may surprise you to know that if I were sentenced to a donut-free lifestyle, I’d likely take it in stride. You may think it ironic that the founder and cheerleader-in-chief of our Friday Donut Club did not grow-up consuming these delicacies (weird!) and, if push came to shove, would be perfectly content to do without (gasp!). When we were getting started many years ago, I was lukewarm as to the choice of pastry (heresy?). Granted, my persona is that of a donut aficionado and, yes, the FDC is all about the donuts… but the e-mails that accompany it are not (even though the word “donut” is imprinted in all of them). In-fact, I enjoy writing these e-mails and having conversations with you far more than the donuts themselves (don’t get me wrong, I DO like the donuts). Over the years, my donut e-mails have gone from being a call to action (come get your donuts) to a humble attempt at brightening your Fridays with a curious fact, random association or pro...

Dear Members and Constituents, I have a confession to make: I did not attend kindergarten. Although I had not made much of it, lately I’ve been wondering whether it’s a foundational gap in my education that’s holding me back. Could it be true that everything you need to know you learn in kindergarten? Could not possessing this secret knowledge be keeping a holder of two masters degrees such as myself back? Could I be missing some fundamental human behavioral trait due of this omission? And, if so, is it too late for me to attend? My gut says it might be a bit too weird. How would my dozen or so five-year-old class mates react? How about the teacher? Would the school even let me enroll? On second thought, I think I'm not going to pursue that path. Perhaps I’ll settle for a kindergarten mentor who can help me reach my goal of becoming a budding boss. Then again, I am engaged with some pretty cool projects I really like. How many people can say that about their day jobs? Also on t...

Dear Members and Constituents, Friday morning has arrived What a day, hip, hooray! Feels so good to be alive, feel the breeze, if you please. Looking up into the sky It’s all blue How about you? Cannot frown although I try Life is good, it’s understood. Driving in I found no theme, what to say this fine day? All I could do was to dream, just relax to the max. Till I got here then it hit me I must write it’s the rite. Call to action, come and see they arrived donut time. Our boy Brad Christian has done great a deluge some are huge. Grab a couple it’s your fate Please enjoy boy, o boy! Happy Friday!

Dear Members and Constituents, As I skim world events, it seems apparent to me we live in a privileged nation. I will concede my views are probably distorted by the press and their attempt to narrow all that happens in any given country to a single theme. I picture myself comfortably reclining on a psychologist’s soft leather couch, playing the classic word association game (say the first word that comes to mind) with country names… Bahrain (protests), Somalia (famine), Syria (protests), Greece (bailout), Libya (protests), Mexico (drug violence), Yemen (protests), North Korea (lunacy), Malawi (protests), Japan (nuclear rector), Tunisia (protests –successful), Iran (lunacy), Egypt (protests –successful), Ireland (bailout)… Granted, we have our share of problems (a debt ceiling encroaching, a fiscal deficit looming and a heat wave oppressing the north east) but in the grand scheme of things Americans appear to lead charmed lives. Donut Club members in particular have the added benefit of...

Dear Members and Constituents, Why is it doing the right thing is sometimes harder than it ought to be? On the surface, it seems like it should be very straightforward: do good, avoid evil. Yet even the best of us will sometimes tell a white lie, indulge in a sideways glance or falter on our diets. It’s not like we set-out to do the wrong thing, either. I don’t think any of us wakes up in the morning saying “I’m going to do something bad today”. So why do we do it? The way I see it, we are being pulled in many directions and given the choice of multiple “goods” which are often in conflict with each other. When we choose a lesser good, we inadvertently move in the wrong direction of the higher “good vs. evil” axis. You tell a white lie because you don’t want to disappoint someone. Sparing their feelings is a good thing, yet in the process you fail to tell the truth. Cheating on an exam gets you a good grade but prevents you from learning that valuable lesson that will serve you later in...

Dear members and constituents, As I prepare for my final day in the office before my twelve day trip to Ecuador, I am reminded donuts are hard to come-about in my home country. It’s bad enough that I have to miss the fire works, but to also deprive my taste buds of the sweet deep-fried taste of donuts seems too hard to bear. Might I take a dozen with me –one for every day of my trip? Sure they'll still be fresh when I get there tomorrow morning, but how long can they hold? Would I need to put any jelly or cream-filled donuts in a Ziploc bag –to comply with the 3-1-1 rule? Might I get in trouble from luggage-sniffing dogs –after all, they are POLICE dogs? Fortunately, my flight doesn't leave till midnight, so the decision can wait and there are plenty of Winchell’s donuts at my desk (courtesy of Eric Jochens, donut boy), so I don’t have to think on an empty stomach. On this fourth of July eve, come enjoy one of the fringe benefits of being in America. Happy Friday! P.S. A couple...

Dear Members and Constituents, Why is it Father's Day gets so much less attention than Mother's Day? As a father I must admit I don't personally care much for the day and I'm okay with moms getting all the hype. Sure it would be nice to get a watch or something but I'm not counting the days until Father's Day. On the other hand, I get the impression mothers appreciate their day more (as do retailers). I think we need to get over the politically correct view that men's and women's needs are the same. Sometimes they are. Often they're not. Obviously, as with any generalization, any specific example I cite as to why they’re different (beyond genetics) will likely not be well received by someone (blame it on individual differences). This principle also applies to donuts. There's glazed and there's specialty and we are okay with buying more glazed. Granted, today would've been a good day to make an exception by celebrating Boston's NHL vi...

Dear members and constituents, Happy national donut day! I must admit I was caught flat-footed for this event. I arrived at the office this morning and as I stared at my computer’s diagnostics blue screen, a couple of folks called this event to my attention. So why is it we celebrate national donut day and how did I miss it? As for the former, I think it’s self-evident. For the latter, I guess I was too busy to pay attention. It felt like my elevated level of activity might be, in part, for activity's sake alone. I suppose that is a human trait. We badmouth work and yet we do work that seems to have no other purpose than keeping us busy. We water the lawn so the grass can grow so we can mow the lawn. Lather, rinse, repeat. Hundreds of e-mails get read, so hundreds of e-mails can backfill those positions. Reports get produced, memos get written, voice mails recorded. Our frenzied lifestyles make it easy to lose sight that we're actually making progress and doing things for a goo...

Dear Members and Constituents, They say any extreme is bad (too much or too little of just about anything can be harmful). If you doubt this conventional wisdom, just ask Osama Bin Laden (wait, you can’t!). Nonetheless, extreme positions and actions have a certain appeal. They are simple, straightforward and don’t require much thought. In-fact, some extremes can be pretty cool. If you doubt this, just ask any extreme sports enthusiast. I witnessed an example of a cool extreme on Saturday. I’m talking about the stage for the U2 360° tour . It has a unique articulated circular video display made of 888 hexagonal LED screens which tends to make the unprepared concert attendee (i.e. me) do a double-take (wait, did it just do that?). The huge spider-like structure (aka the Claw), the light shows, the sound quality, the ambiance were all awe-inspiring, but are they worth the estimated $25 - $30 Million dollars the stage alone is said to have cost? I’ll let you be the judge of that. Then aga...

Dear Members and Constituents, I heard it from a friend who heard it from a friend who heard it from another there's a new study out. According to rumors this study about gossip proves we are hardwired to eat-up negative things said about others. In a perverse way, this makes sense. Knowledge is power and having dirt on people gives us leverage over them. Just the latest negative trait being portrayed in a positive light by scientists. I’d like to think we're better than that. Blackmail, backhanded deeds and backstabbing should not be seen as a path to success. Granted, there are many examples of prominent people who have used these traits to their advantage (just read the news). But, do you really want to live in a dog-eat-dog world? At the end of the day, I want to be able to live with myself more than I want the comforts and power of this world. I believe teamwork, truth and trust are a higher path… and let us not forget donuts. They embody what is good and pure about manki...

Dear Members and Constituents, Yesterday, at the San Francisco airport, I had some time before my flight so I decided to dine at the steakhouse. It felt like a good match. Here's a place where a captive audience has time between flights and nervous appetites to feed. I was anxiously anticipating that first juicy bite of rare steak. As the waitress arrived, I realized there was something amiss. It was not so much the fact that the meat was cooked to a medium term that dismayed me, but the fact that I had to use a plastic knife to discover it. Sure, I understand it would be a defeatist thing to disarm all would-be terrorists at the security check point, only to turn-around and arm them with a steak knife at the food court. Still, I was a bit disappointed. Fortunately with the donut club you know what to expect and you get it, courtesy of Yuko Aoyagi (donut girl). So come get yours (no need to arrive an hour early, go through security, or use plastic knives). Happy Friday!

Dear Members and Constituents, A few years ago, in business school, I heard the story of the Chevy Nova and it’s disastrous commercial failure in Latin America. You see, “no va” in Spanish means “it does not go” (presumably anywhere). While I was not familiar with that case in particular (perhaps a testament to how bad a flop the launch really was), I had encountered several comical inadvertent translations. There was the time my grandmother (an American visiting us in Ecuador) yelled at the maid from the shower “Cecilia, la sopa”. Cecilia, who spoke no English, was puzzled as to why my grandmother would want soup in the shower (needless to say, she wanted soap –“el jabón”). There was the American exchange student who at an awkward moment revealed she was very “embarazada” (which translates to pregnant, adding to the “embarrassment” she meant to convey). The same student was very “exitada” to see me (I must have been a hot thirteen year old for her to be “aroused”… only later did I re...

Dear Members and Constituents, What a crazy week it’s been... and personally, I’m glad it’s over. The whirlwind of banal media coverage surrounding every detail of the royal wedding (who cares if Prince Andrew won’t have a wedding band because it reminds him of the common donut?). The whirlwind of children pillaging and plundering their parents’ offices (you mean there aren’t donuts in your office every day?). The whirlwind of, well, wind setting an unofficial record for tornado touch-downs this month (are those donuts raining from the sky?)... In a roundabout way these events seem to twist together into a nice circular form. And much like the circular pastries sitting at my desk, they will soon be a distant memory. Don't let this event also pass you by, make history, grab your donut -here today courtesy of Monisha Merchant (donut girl). Happy Friday!

[Posted by Ed Stocker in JP's absence] Dear Members and Constituents, JP, along with many of our co-workers, is out today supporting Junior Achievement (JA) at DuPont Elementary. I (and if you are reading this Friday morning probably you too) was unable to participate this year. JA uses one particularly fitting example on their website of how they explain business concepts to Elementary students. While explaining different production methods, students might learn about unit vs. assembly line production methods by producing donuts. If I’m in that class my first thought is FIELD TRIP. I wonder if JP will gravitate to this example in his class? For those of us unable to participate in JA day there’s no need for a field trip, Donut Boy, Marc Solome has delivered four dozen wonderful donuts to us this morning courtesy of Krispy Kreme (whose automated assembly line is on display in most stores for field trip viewing). JP isn’t in but the donuts are so come on down (to JP’s) ...

Dear Members and Constituents, Wandering the Grand Canyon trails this week I noticed trees in unlikely places. The more unlikely the place the more regal the tree. This made me wonder whether these trees have a sense for their aesthetic value or an appreciation for their awesome surroundings. It also made me aware this distinction comes at a price. Poor soil, water scarcity and higher exposure to inclement weather come to mind. Yet these trees seem to thrive despite the adversity; or, dare I say, on account of it. Does this principle apply to people as well? Perhaps my mishaps on this trip were helping me build character. The speeding ticket in Moab, the chronically deflating air mattress at the camp site and the deer we hit on the way back were all there to help me become a regal tree. Perhaps… What I do know for sure is donuts have arrived, courtesy of John Schoder (donut boy). So don’t be a stick in the mud and come grab one. Happy Friday!

Dear Members and Constituents, This morning, as I turned my radio on, I was horrified to hear of a global network of censors being used in conjunction with the Japan nuclear disaster fall-out. Censorship… why? I could understand a totalitarian regime like the ones crumbling in the middle east using a network of censors, but… and then it hit me. Sensors. That made a lot more sense. I felt silly. Like the closed captioning typist who was fired from her job for transcribing a story of Gorillas in Colombia. The folks putting the English language together must have a dark sense of humor. Why else would words with diametrically opposed meanings sound identical? Sensors inform you while censors hide things. Gorillas lead peaceful lives, secluded from the chaos of modern life while guerrillas are literally “little wars”. You raise a building and, when its useful life is done you raze it. Along the same lines we have donut vs. do-not. This morning, I encourage you to grab a donut, so do-not be ...