Friday Donuts

Friends, Conservative, moderate or liberal. Libertarian, republican or democrat. With over 70 political issues spread across a dozen categories, expecting anybody, let alone a political party or candidate, to be fully aligned with your views is a tad unrealistic. An “us vs. them” mentality is overly simplistic and blindly pinning your hopes on one party while demonizing the others is misguided at best, and probably dangerous. On the bright side, no matter which geriatric presidential hopeful wins, I’m glad the U.S. government is designed to move at a glacial pace to prevent the tyranny of the majority. Also on the bright side, this year’s mail-in ballot came with a casual, encouraging “Yo, Vote!” sticker– well, technically it’s the Spanish version of “I Voted”. Still, it felt laptop-worthy. Also, note my donut pillow on the selfie – which reminds me, I should go grab one. Happy Friday!

Friends, This year for lent, I’m giving up euphemisms. Which means over the next 40 days (not counting Sundays) no one will be let go, under the weather or pass away. They might however get fired, be sick or die. The flatulent will fart, the overzealous will be aggressive and those who have a complicated relationship with the truth will just be liars. I know what you’re thinking… what about the vertically challenged, big boned and unique looking folks out there? Well… they’ll still be short, fat and ugly. Now some of you may rightly argue lenten sacrifices are supposed to be good things (after all, abstaining from sin and vice is something we should do all the time, not just during lent). To you I say, while euphemisms may border on white lies, they’re used to protect sensitive ears from unsavory words, and there’s no rule against their use. And so, this first Friday in the Lenten season, in addition to abstaining from meat, I will also forgo sweet torus-shaped pastries. I will have a

Friends, With the lunar year of the dragon upon us, a roundup of these serpent bodied behemoths felt in order. There's the dreaded demon, defeated by Saint Michael the archangel, and the revered Chinese Loong, promising good fortune. Amaru, Quetzalcoatl, Apophis, Hydra, Leviathan and 120 other subspecies names permeate myths and legends across every corner of the globe. From Tolkien to Martin, fantasy writers have been fascinated by them — even some whose name isn't J.R.R. Then there’s dragonflies and snapdragons; dragon mothers and if I continue writing, well this note will… drag on (-;. So I’ll stop and wish you a happy new year. Have yourself a delicious donut and afterwards be sure to brush your teeth, lest you be cursed with... you guessed it... dragon breath! Happy Friday!

Friends, Truth. Goodness. Beauty. In a world where absolutes are tempered by nuance, true north feels elusive. Opinion and perspective may cloud our vision — and judgment— but they don’t change reality. Sure sometimes circumstance may shift the answer, but facts do not depend on your belief to be true; actions don’t need your approval to be good; and things don’t need to align with your aesthetic sensibility to be beautiful. Conversely, no matter how hard I may believe I’m impervious to poison, a sip of cyanide will still kill me. Regardless of my motives, my hating you would still be wrong. And while beauty is often found in the eye of the beholder, jealousy is always ugly. And of course, donuts are always delicious. Periodt. Happy Friday!