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Voting (buttons) for superior J.O.E.

Irony [ahy-ruh-nee] the use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning
Dear Members and Constituents,
I’d like to meet the marketing professional at Sara Lee Corporation who came-up with the name “Superior Coffee” (you know, the stuff in our break room). This person must have (1) a dark sense of humor (2) cojones the size of Alaska and/or (3) lost all touch with reality. Grab a bag and you’ll read it’s not just “Superior”, it’s the “World’s Finest”. But wait, the irony does not end there. The marketing spin goes-on to claim: “It matters. Every pot of coffee brewed. Every sip of coffee tasted. That’s why we put our passion for coffee into every cup you pour. It’s mattered to us since 1908. Superior Coffee. Every cup counts.” Wow! That’s the kind of stuff that gives marketing a bad rap. And yet, we drink it (at least I do). Why? Two words: convenience (it’s there) and cost (the price is right).
I think the time is right for a social experiment (inspired by recent conversations I’ve had with Monisha Merchant). A rebellion if you will.
Picture this:
  • Same coffee maker,
  • Same coffee pots,
  • Dunkin’ Donuts® coffee.
How, you ask? It’s quite simple, really. I propose the creation of the Java Optimization Establishment (or J.O.E.), a voluntary organization committed to one thing: better break-room Joe. Members of the J.O.E. would voluntarily contribute money to purchase, you guessed it, Dunkin’ Donuts Coffee -at Costco. This coffee would be available to ALL people with access to the 32C break room (regardless of JOE membership). While some may get a free ride, I believe folks generally will do the right thing if they find value and are made aware of the circumstances by which they get it. Convenience? Check! Cost? About $0.12 a cup (if prepared as directed, of course).
While the coffee brand has a donut connection, membership in the J.O.E. does not. Membership in the Friday Donut Club is not a pre-requisite to join the J.O.E. You can be a member of one, or the other (or both) associations. Feel free to forward this message to any suspected coffee drinkers I may have missed.
Use this e-mail’s voting buttons to tell me whether or not you wish to be a charter J.O.E. member. As mentioned earlier, it’s an experiment. Only time will tell if it works, but, in the words of Wayne Gretzky, you miss 100% of the shots you never take. Today, you will find Dunkin’ Donuts coffee in the 32C break room (I’ve provided the “seed” capital –which should last a week). Today, you will find five dozen LaMar’s donuts at my desk (John Nickey has provided the dough-nuts –which should last all day). So, hit that voting button, grab a cup of Joe from the break room and take a spin to my desk. Your donut awaits.
Happy Friday,

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