Expectations and reality don’t always align. When I noticed the layered salt deposits forming on the brim of my running cap I envisioned a pleasing texture and patina would eventually cover the whole article --if only I resisted the urge to wash it. A few months later, it’s clear the experiment has failed and the unsanitary results should be burned. Or, take these words emblazoned on a commercial vehicle: “FIRE WATER SMOKE MOLD”. I half-expected an itinerant shaman promoting alcohol and smoking fungi as tools for a vision quest. The disappointing truth, it turns out, the company specializes in damage restoration. I find the best way to overcome such cognitive dissonances is to take a breath, bite into a donut and laugh your unreasonable expectations out of the room.