A Special Interest in Donuts

Dear Members and Constituents,

JP isn’t with us this morning, his schedule has him traveling across the country meeting with customers and presumably trying exotic new varieties of Donuts. He has left behind a few words for your consumption this morning along with your weekly donut fix.

According to a recent study by researchers at the University of British Columbia, it costs an average of $145 in campaign spending to sway the average undecided U.S. voter. This same study finds special interest groups get $71 in government subsidies for every dollar in political contributions they make. If you believe these statistics then the average swing voter costs taxpayers $10,295. Talk about high acquisition costs! This also means that if half of our next president’s billion or so dollar campaign spending comes from Special Interests, they should expect to get $35 Billion in taxpayer subsidies –and that’s the presidential race alone. Add congressional races (likely to spend another billion and change) –assume half is spent by the winning side and 75% comes from special interests- and you’re talking $60 Billion. How is this possible, you ask? Simple, that’s less than 2% of the federal government’s 2012 fiscal year budget… a rounding error. Still, like the old sage is reported to have once said: add a billion here and a billion there and pretty soon you’re talking real money.

When dealing with such large quantities, it helps if you provide a frame of reference to put things into perspective. The way I see it, if you were to take this money and invest it in donuts, you could give every man, woman and child in America a free donut every day for an entire year (assuming you can get them for $6.50 a dozen –a conservative estimate for such awesome buying power, if you ask me). Of course, this morning you don’t need any politicians owing you favors to get free donuts. Just come-on over and enjoy one (or more), courtesy of Eric Rosenberg. He makes his debut as donut boy with four dozen delicious specimens form Krispy Kreme. Whether you vote blue, red or green; conservative, liberal or libertarian… come join me. Today we’re all “donutarians”.

Happy Friday!

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