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Boon or Con?

Friends,
This week, I received a voicemail stating I had won the "prize of a lifetime", a "$5,000 a week, forever prize, or a full lump sum payout of a whopping $5 million, with the keys to a brand-new car in [my] color of choice." As I ponder this windfall, the first question that comes to my mind is why just the keys? Also, what color should I choose, who uses the word "whopping", and how did I get entered to win this prize? The answer to the latter question, like any good horoscope, is vague enough to sound plausible: apparently, I entered a sweepstakes "based on past subscriptions and cross-promotion through credit card expenditure." And, of course, this delightful surprise was "approved by the Federal Trade Commission", so it can't possibly be a scam designed to exploit naïve suckers. Can it? As I begin to count my soon-to-hatch chickens, I will go sit outside and wait for some donuts to rain out of the clear sky. Who knows, maybe the donut fairy will be handing them out. Who says there’s no such thing as a free breakfast?
Happy Friday!

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